Overextended and loving most of it by Lisa Harper Book Review (Book Sneeze)

I read Overextended and Loving Most of It: The Unexpected Joy of Being Harried, Heartbroken, and Hurling Oneself Off Cliffs by Lisa Harper, in exchange for honest review from BookSneeze. This post contains an Amazon Affiliate Link.



I choose to review the book because I am overextended. I blog. I parent special needs kids. I go to church. I am in school. I have to deal with other annoying relatives. I have to find time to write, do homework, and exercise. My life has gotten more hectic since my oldest returned to public school. I am back to getting up early and making sure Brad goes to bed on time. I also have to remember to wash his school clothes, every other day.

I started reading the book a few days ago and finished more than half of the book in one sitting. The book is excellent. Harper discussed the ups and downs of adoption. She also discussed her work with women in rehab, who struggle with prostitution and drug addiction. She has her ups and downs, but still worked on getting closer to Christ and expanding her ministry and volunteer work. I, on the other hand, struggle with time management, and frustration from not being able to complete tasks, like I used to. I have no ministry at church, even though I want to, because I don't have a ride to most events. I do sign up for events and hope I am able to volunteer when the day arrives. I have worked for the fall festival, vacation bible school, and the summer carnival. I am interested in the media department though to learn how to use my camera equipment, while also serving God and the church.

Some highlights I liked from the book:

Page 7: "but then I had a conversation with a friend over coffee, that convinced me being overextended can be biblical.....(a few passages pass) I think this is what we're supposed to look like when we stand before jesus. I don't think we're supposed to show up in glory with time to spare, a fresh manicure, and perfect hair. I think if we're really living the gospel, we're going to fall at his feet exhausted and messy, with mismatched socks, just plump worn out from loving people as hard as we can."

Page 7: "Life isn't always orderly and relationships rarely fold neatly with hospital corners. Real life...abundant life....God-honoring life is about loving Jesus and the people he allows to rub shoulders with well. Which means some days we'll be stretched emotionally and physically. We'll be taxed to the max."

The book was a good read. Harper discussed expanding our boundaries/limits to helping others in need, even when we are stressed out. She also discusses God's peace and asking God for guidance through it all.

PowerMyLearning Review (Sverve)

I reviewed PowerMyLearning, in exchange for honest review from Sverve. This is a sponsored post. I wanted to work with PowerMyLearning because my oldest child learns better via the computer and visual aides. Even though Brad is home-schooled, he still needs additional help learning. I have to find different methods to help him learn new things. I also signed Kalen up for an account. Kalen is starting to show an interest in the computer, other than trying to break the keyboard, mouse, and the printer. I bought him a little laptop, to teach him 6 things: A, B, C, 1, 2, and 3. Kalen starts school next year. He will be in Head Start and a Pre-school for kids with intellectual disabilities.

PowerMyLearning is an educational website for educators, parents, and children. The website provides games and activities for children. The parents can monitor the children's progress through the parent account.

You do have to create a separate account for each child, as well as the parent. The children's account needs to be created first. Then, create the parent and add each child's user name. The website then sends a request to the child to connect parent to child.

Also, the kids accounts don't require an e-mail to sign up. They will need their username, password, city, state, and birthday, in addition to school name.

I did it backwards. I created my account first, thinking I can add my children through the parent account, similar to a few other websites. Then, to add your child, it asks for a user name. Can't have a user name if your child does not have account. So, I went to create Brad and Kalen an account. Logged back into mine and added his user name. The website then said it will send a request to Brad to add me as his parent (which is a good thing and a bad thing. What if the child does not want you to track his progress? I definitely recommend the parents setting up all the accounts. ). The process will take a minute for parents with multiple kids.

Then, you log into each child's account, click on their name towards the top, and go to account. There are two options. Link the accounts or select, not my parent. (Another reason, I recommend the parents set up the account).

The website has over 2000 activities in subjects, which include:

1. Math
2. Science
3. Language Arts
4. Art and Music
5. World Languages
6. Social Studies
7. Your Life
8. Technology

I played with the games at first to see how easy or hard they are? Do the games require a lot of clicking? Do the games require a lot of comprehension? You can select games based on subject or grade level. I started at Kindergarten because both kids need to learn the basics. Kalen starts pre-k next year and Brad is in the 6th grade, but still needs the lower grade basics, such as counting, learning numbers, and ABCs. For Brad, I may mix it up a bit, letting him work on activities ranging from K to 6th to see what he can and can't do. For Kalen, I am going to help him prepare for school next year. Kalen will be attending two schools: head start and the school for developmental disabilities.

One game I liked, is Energy City, created by the Jason Project. The game is more for advanced learners. It is a partial city builder game and part strategy. You complete missions, while also keeping the city from running out of money and energy. It teaches kids how to conserve energy.

I am Second Blog Campaign

I am participating in the I am Second Blog Campaign, courtesy of FlyBy Promotions Blogger Network. I received a t-shirt and bracelet for participation.

About I am Second:

I have heard of I am second prior to this campaign. I loved the work everyone was doing. I was happy to be chosen for this campaign. I have to learn to put God first, instead of myself. I can be selfish at times, where I feel I have to rely on me first, because I don't trust others or I feel no one can do it the way I can. Sometimes I can be impatient. God should be the first person, I talk to every morning and last one, I should talk to every night. God should be apart of every decision. I am involved in.

The campaign involves actors, athletes, drug addicts, Business leaders, musicians, and regular, everyday people, struggling. Some are struggling with drugs, alcohol, abortion, anger, child abuse, cancer, etc. The stories provide hope, inspiration, peace, and fulfillment all from a Christian perspective. The mission is to put God first and you second.

Information from the website:

I am Second is a movement to inspire people to live for God and for others.

You can Call, chat, or email I am Second, 24 hours a day.

You also can talk with people about your life, your struggles. 

Share the vision of I am Second. Share the Videos. Discuss the films.

Start an I am Second Group. Volunteer. Serve. Organize. Follow on Facebook, Twitter.

About Seconds Change:

You can help I am second raise money to develop, produce, and promote new films. Commit $2 every Tuesday to support Seconds Change. Become a fan on Facebook.

Social Media:

Facebook
Twitter
Website

Tales of the Defended Ones Book Review

I reviewed Tales of the Defended Ones, in exchange for honest review from Litfuse. The book was written by Beth Guckenburger and published by Standard Publishing. I received a paperback version of the book.


About the book (From Litfuse's website)

Ben and Joseph lose their mothers, but find a family looking just for them. Antonio is rescued from what seems like a hopeless situation. Caitlyn dares to trust that truth will set her free. Jorani is delivered from slavery into the arms of grace.


Follow these real-life stories as they take you on a journey to foreign places and extreme struggles. Travel through their challenges and see the hand of the great Storyweaver – our Defender God shielding and defending the defenseless in the amazing ways only he can.These are the tales of the ones left wounded and weak-ones made whole and strong . .


About the author (From Litfuse's website: )


Beth Guckenberger and her husband, Todd, are the founders of Back2Back Ministries which communicates a lifestyle of service by sharing the love of Christ and serving God through service to others. Guckenberger travels and speaks regularly at women’s and missions conferences, as well as youth gatherings and church services. In addition to her children’s releases in the Storyweaver series, Guckenberger has written two mission-minded books. She has also partnered with Standard Publishing on the mission content in its 2013 VBS program. The Guckenberger family lives and serves in Monterrey, Mexico


My Review:


I started reading the book today, uninterrupted for about an hour or so. I was halfway through the book before I realized it. The book talked about God's love through adoptions and mission work. The children faced real struggles at an early age. Death of parents and abuse was covered in the first three stories. I chose the book because I loved the description. I am also reviewing more Christian-based books. I wasn't sure of the book at first, but I am glad I was selected for the blog tour I was completely moved by the time, I got to Antonio's story. Ben and Joseph's story was first. They was adopted from Africa. Ben's mother had tuberculosis. Ben also was malnourished. Joseph's mother was pregnant and worked for an elderly lady. She went into labor, headed to a clinic to deliver the baby, and died during child birth. She left Joseph with her employer, but after a week of not hearing from Joseph's mama, the employer took Joseph to the orphanage. Both boys were adopted by the same family


My emotions took a turn for the worse, when I read Antonio's story next. I was in tears. Antonio lived in Mexico. He had epilepsy (with seizures). I used to have seizures, in addition to both of my sons having seizures (Brad grew out of his, Kalen still has them). Antonio's mother had no support because people avoided her. Antonio was also kicked out of school because his teacher could not handle his disorder. His father was not around much--then he died. His mother was also facing cancer. She was worried that when she died, no one would care for her son. She also thought about taking Antonio to heaven with her. An neighbor noticed Antonio and called a case worker. The case worker called a home, which took in kids, no one else wanted--especially those with mental and physical disabilities. I cried when I read how the mother wanted to take Antonio to heaven with her because no one wanted to care for her child. As a mother of special needs children, I was hurt, sad, and definitely empathetic. I hope that when I die, my kids will not be split up and will have a happy home. My family offers little support and their father offers little support.


Next, I read the story of Caitlyn. She was bullied at school. She was being abused, but protective of her mother. Behavioral problems also occurred. She did not want to be taken away from her mother. Her mother's boyfriend was beating her. Her mother was pregnant and on drugs. Her brother was born with drugs in his system. Her brother was taken away, when he was born because of the addiction. both siblings were adopted by the same family.


Finally, the book talked about Jorani. Jorani, who was a girl, lived in Cambodia, in a river village. Her parents died in a traffic accident, months prior. She and her sisters lived with Grandma, who was ailing, and Jorani had to help care for the younger ones. She took on small jobs to help feed her siblings. Jourani heard about a jobs, in the city; went to inquire about one, and he started her into child slavery. When she was no longer useful, she was homeless. Her granny started feeling better and started searching for her granddaughter. Jourani's story had a beautiful ending.


At the end of each story, the author provided a space for you to journal your thoughts and answer a question. This would be great for small group studies. The book is also written in easy-to-understand language. This book was a quick read because I was so engrossed in the story. The author also provides an interview with Joseph and Ben, at the end of the book.

I want to date, go out, have a life, and not always involve the kids

Another rant from a special needs parent: Some things you may have heard before

I want to date, go  out, and have a life, and not always with the kids. I love my kids, yes I do, but some days, I need a break. I don't have babysitters because I do not trust too many people with my special ones. I don't know too many real-life people, who do not voice their diverse, irritating opinion about my babies.

1. Why does Brad act that way?
2. Brad just needs a whipping and his autism will go away?
3. You need to watch your kids 24 hours a day. You don't need sleep. Your kids are too bad.
4. I hope Kalen does not turn out like Brad. 
5. I hope Kalen will be the normal one
6. When you die, I am sending Brad back to his father and keeping Kalen. 
7. When is Brad going back to live with Brad Sr. 
8. I can't keep Brad because he not potty trained. He will pee on the couch (even wearing a pull-up). But Can I keep Kalen (who wears diapers)
9. If only you would, then Brad or Kalen would not ________________________
10. Put Brad on additional medications, which will make him a zombie or sleep all day, to make my life (not Stacie's) easier. 

I hear people, who want to date me, ask When do you get time for yourself? When do you get a break? The question is old. The question irritates me because my kids are with me most of the time. If I sleep, I have two kids in my bed. If I go to the bathroom, a kid or two is knocking on the door. Maybe, a kid is in his bouncer in the bathroom with me to protect him from his big brother.

There is a nursery and SPED class at church though, but still I check the pager consistently to see if the kids are acting up.

I don't want to have sex yet. I do not drink a lot. My life is about the kids. I just want time to think, to breathe, to socialize.

Then, you have to consider things have changed. I used to have one kid, who stayed with his father. I got him on some weekends. I did not get him all the time. Didn't want to inconvenience anyone. Didn't want Brad to feel unwelcome. I also did not feel I could offer Brad all he needs. Thought since he was a boy, his father could control, discipline, and teach him manly things.

Since I got Brad full-time again, in 2011, I learned Brad really did need me. Some things I have taught him, I wish I taught him before, like peeing and showering and brushing his teeth. If it wasn't for Kalen being born, I would never have appreciated Brad more. I had conflicting thoughts during the pregnancy. Could I love this child? Will he be special needs? When will I see Brad again? Will I have a full-term pregnancy? I also had thoughts about my first two miscarriages, which consumed me.

Eventually, I decided that I wanted a child, a boy child, who will live. I didn't care if he was 5 armed, 30 fingers, and green. I wanted my baby. I wanted my oldest son. I did not, never, ever, ever, want another miscarriage again. and after Kalen was born, I got fixed. I had a new appreciation for the unborn male child and my oldest child. Anything was better than another miscarry. Anything was better than losing a baby, legs propped up, in a hospital alone.

I love my kids. I am responsible for my kids. I will cuss and fuss and fight and kill for my chillens. Definitely a crazy parent, with anger and other un-diagnosed mental issues.

I don't like being needed (all the darn time)

The title explains it all: I do not like being needed all the darn time. It's one thing for the kids to need me. They need food, shelter, a diaper change, something to drink. They need to be bathed and dressed and nurtured and loved. It's another thing, when its other humans. I know no man is an island and people need each other, just not from the same person all the darn time. I don't mind helping aliens, humans, and other annoyances. I don't mind editing the occasional paper or watching the bad brat, from time to time.  Fulfill your needs from multiple parties, not just me. I am only one human, with two kids, graduate school, blogger, and book reviewer. I am part cook, part maid, part insane.

My mother and cousin is notorious for doing this, but my cousin is worse. Stacie, Can I have ____. Stacie can I borrow______________. Every time I turn around, someone is asking for something. I do have to wonder a few facets though:

1. If you are always asking for stuff, do you ever plan on buying your own or continue to use up my (and kids) stuff? It is easy to buy your own stuff versus always asking from others, especially the basics (soap, toilet tissue, washing powder, baby supplies). I understand if you need something for an emergency, but not every day. 
2. If you are always asking for help, did you try to fix it on your own first? did you consult a manual? did you ask other people? Call tech support? Do you really need help OR are you asking me to do it for you?
3. Do you seriously like annoying me? Because I am not a people person. I am an anti-social human being. I hate being bothered all darn day (especially when Aunt Flo in town and she is getting on my nerves right now). 

Today, I got asked to keep my great-niece, while I was setting up for speech therapy for Brad. I got asked for the baby tub. I got asked to help hook up the vacuum. I even got asked for mouthwash and underwear. 

From a Christian standpoint, I do not have a servant spirit or gift. I am administration. I do have anger management issues, patience issues, and not a people person (Yes I know I repeated myself, but I have an A-type Personality, with anti-social tendencies). 

Yesterday, my cousin asked me for the baby tub to wash my great niece. I was washing Kalen at the time because he had an appointment with the orthopedist. Told her, leave the baby on my bed, I will clean her, and bring her downstairs, since I have to come downstairs anyway. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, this heifer-like person, decided to sit on my bed, watch me bathe the babies, and offer comments. It's 8 am in the morning. I have a 930 home appointment. Go away. but I hear:  I want to sit and talk to you.  Are they going to use the same water or are you going to change it out? Are you going to dry him off before putting her in the water? Are you using too much soap? Kalen has good hair. Blah blah blah Wah Wah Wah. 

I do like being needed, but not all the darn time. 

Farfalla: a story of loss and hope by Vanita Oelschlager

http://www.vanitabooks.com/

I read Farfalla, in exchange for review from Netgalley.Com. The book was written by Vanita Oelschlager and published by Vanita Books. First, I loved the graphics. They was amazing. The book tells the story of Little Beetle and the caterpillars. Little beetle plays with the caterpillars over the summer. One day, little Beetle notices the caterpillars are gone and misses his friends. His mother tells him about how caterpillars change. Towards the end, there was one cocoon left, and the little beetle names the butterfly Farfalla. The rest is for you to read.

The words were a little advanced for my boys, but I loved reading the book for myself. The book is a great read.

Death and Life

Wrote this in church on Sunday, after the sermon. The assistant pastor was discussing how he lost a child, which made me cry. I had two miscarries, which affected me deeply, so I understood his lost. Pastor O also discussed how people should rejoice in their lost. Thank the Lord, no matter what they are going through. Look for the good in the bad.
Some days I want kids, who are fully potty trained and an speak a bunch of words. I want to know what they are thinking and I don’t have to deal with major meltdowns and medications. Definitely no seizures. I want my kids to have friends, and not be excluded.


Yet, I can give thanks to God because it could have been worse. Brad could have died on the table at birth because the placenta got caught in his lungs, but God pulled him through. My grandma died the day before Brad was born (November 8, 2000). My great grandma died months before (May, 2000). Maybe he could have been seriously injured after having multiple seizures. Kalen could have had the same thing happen during his petit mal seizures.


I don’t know if my kids will ever deal with drugs, alcohol, or sex. I don’t know if my kids will ever date, get married, have girlfriends, go out on dates, or have kids.
I also have to think once again about the miscarries. I never planned on having kids. If I did, I only wanted two or three. If my two miscarries did not happen, Kalen might not have been here, but since they died, I do have a greater appreciation of both Kalen and Brad. I still hate labor and delivery. I am still not naturally maternal. I love my kids more. Thankful for them more. Appreciate them more. More protective of them more. Through death, it brings life. It brought me my youngest son and it also brought life to me.

Uriah and Loyalty Part II

Pastor Pender discussed Uriah and Loyalty again this Sunday. Uriah had to explain his loyalty, was tested for his loyalty, and was exploited for his loyalty. First, Uriah had to explain his loyalty to God to a king, who backslid. David liked to party, drink, and have sex. He did not understand where Uriah was currently at. David did not understand why after a battle, Uriah did not want to go home to his wife. Loyalty to something can cause others to feel uncomfortable and out of their element. Sometimes when you are loyal to something, like celibacy or a marriage, loyalty can bring out the worst in people. People may not like you any more. People may see you as problem because you deviated from their norm. People want you to do what they are doing.

Next, Uriah was tested. David asked Uriah to stay for two days and then he will release his soldier from something. David invited Uriah to some party, where Uriah had plenty of food and drink. David may have tried to get Uriah drunk to impose his will on Uriah. Uriah still did not go home. He still was dedicated to God. Uriah was a better man drunk than David was sober (Pastor Pender). David tested Uriah so that Uriah will fail. Sometimes people will invite you to partake of something, not because they care, but so they can tell everyone you failed and ruin your testimony.

Finally, Uriah was exploited. David took advantage of Uriah's loyalty. Uriah's loyalty cost him his life. Some people look to pray on others. There are manipulative, deceptive people everywhere.

I don't know where you are in your celibacy journey. I don't know what caused you to take this path. You will have to explain to some people why you are celibate. You will be tested for your beliefs. All sorts of heathens, former sex buddies, wannabe sex buddies will come out of the woodwork. You may have to change your behaviors, attitudes, and approaches to the opposite sex. You may have to delete some phone numbers; delete some pics (others and yours); avoid particular settings; avoid particular conversations; disable/deactivate some websites, and yes avoid some people. But first, you need to know why you chose celibacy. Knowing the reasons why, Knowing your purpose, will keep you more focused. Know your purpose and the rationale and write it down (whether in your phone, in a tablet, in Google Docs, in word). Coming into celibacy is not an easy journey and if you need more support, let me know.

Stacie D. Wyatt
wyattstacie@gmail.com

Morning Frustration

Found me a good church a few weeks back. Has a good special ed program. Nursery. But church van is starting to irk me. First visit. My mother took me and picked me up. Next visit church van. Called and confirmed pick up time. Last week no call no show. Same this week. What's the point of calling for
transportation if no one going show up?


My mother decided to take me to church real quick. The church will provide a way back home, if someone needs one. On the way to church, my mother saw a church van and decided to follow the van to see if it was meant for our house. Keep in mind, the church 10 minutes away and I am almost late. Each van has a list of passengers for pick-up. Instead of honking to determine, she decided to follow the van. The van was meant for my house, (Thank you Jesus). And she did follow it all the way back home. I was very very frustrated at this point. A) No confirmation call from the church. B) Mother said she would take me, but then turned around. C) I hate being late anywhere. I have to walk to the nursery. Sign the kids in. Then Go to church. D) I missed last week because the bus did not show up and it may show signs of a future pattern. 


Anyway, the bus driver was very understanding. He did not know why no one showed up last week. He said he will be my regular driver for this neighborhood. He gave me a time frame for future pick-ups. I got into the church finally, the choir was singing. and then the solo artist (George Something) sung one of my favorite songs (Smokey's Norful's I need you now). The song made me cry and filled my spirit. Not everything will go according to plan or routine. Life has its deviations along the way, but I can not let it frustrate me all the time.