2021 Reflection

December 31, 2021

2020 brought a lot of new changes, but whoo that 2021 brought more changes. Behavioral changes. Anxiety. Massive depression. We have to move in 2022 because the complex is being sold to the city to build a pond. Lack of sleep. Stress. Crisis line. 

Ice storm Texas. Pipes bursting. Kids lost their mattresses. Blackouts. No hot water for almost 3 days, last week. 

On another note: I can go to church for both Sunday School and the Sermon again. I can ride the bus again. I can walk to the store or for fast food again. I haven't fixed a hole in the wall in a while. I don't have to rely on Uber and Lyft to get me around mostly. Completed a customer service experience job training course, through ClimbHire. 2 job interviews coming up. Pray for me and my sanity. 

God has definitely brought me through another year. 

2021 Reflection

 

Trazodone Induced Dreams: The mob

 

December 21, 2021

No clue what was going on in this dream, last night. I was watching Addicted to Marriage; My 600 lb life; and Too Large before going to bed. I even stopped watching crime shows, especially anything on Discovery ID, before going to bed because the dreams can get weird. Nothing to do with gangsters and mobsters. Definitely confused the hell out of me. I seem to remember more dreams when they have people, I know in them.

Here is the parts, I remember. 

I was at my grandma's old house, with a few friends and their kids. Me and one of the kids, went for a walk. The kid told me, that his mama said she didn't care if I got covid walking with him, but he didn't need to get it. I was upset. When we tried to walk back in the house, a mobster stopped us by aiming a gun in our face. I don't know if he was going to shoot us or not. He didn't after we told him, we wanted to go in the house and see our family. He was upset because his friends doesn't consider him family and let us go. 

I went in the house to collect my kid but he wasn't there. No one knew where my child was. Apparently, I had left the house for a while. The friend was upset but I had a mob situation. 

Then some way, some how, I left my kid with a friend, to run errands, but got chased by the mob. They was looking for someone but Im not sure who.  

Another part:

The mob was after us in my grandma house. Me and a few relatives went to hide upstairs because it was more secure. I played dead and didn't get shot. It was hard because I still had to breath, while also scanning the room to see if everyone was ok. 

Another Part: 

I went over someone else's house and the gangsters came in the house, ransacking the place. I hide in the bathroom because of the secured door. But when other people came in the house, the door mysteriously disappeared and I could be seen. 

Another Part: 

Someone brought my grandma's house because they thought the family was dead, even though we was playing dead. Some of the family took on another identity. A tennis player figured out who one of us was because of an award. 

One of my relatives got on tv and was talking about a tennis championship, they won as a kid. The other tennis player realized they was the opponent and got upset because they thought my relative had died. 

The End: I hope I never have a dream like this again. I had strange dreams, like this before, but I haven't had them in a long time. 

Trazodone-Induced Dreams: Missing the Bus.

December 17, 2021

This was definitely one of the strangest dreams, I had, this week.

I had to take my youngest to school because he missed the school bus. I wasn't sure whether to take a rideshare or public transit to get him there. I went to sign him into the office, but there was not a late sign-in sheet. I had to bring Brad with me. 

The lobby then turned into a high school reunion, where I was hugging and greeting old classmates. While I was dealing with Kalen, the group headed to the park (where did it come from) across the street from the school. 

I also had to meet with the new nurse #4 to give her some meds for the month. Kalen was in the nurses office, as well. The nurse mixed his meds in with ranch powder mix and water. Kalen drunk the mix through a straw and loved it. I thought it was a strange way to dispense medication, but then again, it's Kalen and you have to get creative sometimes. 

I walked back outside, where a 9th grader was bringing his brother to school. He wanted to ask a question to the secretary. Since his brother missed the bus, He also missed his bus to a field trip and wanted to know what to do next. The security guard did not want to hear the 9th graders question and wanted him to leave the school. I also was asked to leave when I tried to ask the same question. 

Now, Brad was missing. Where was Brad? He was at the park with the high school reunion, jumping in the bounce house. I grabbed my kid and we headed to the bus stop. I had an appt and needed to head back home to take a bath, then catch the bus. Or do I catch an rideshare, even though I don't have enough money to do that, and head home and take a bath. Maybe just head to the appt, regardless of hygiene. 

The public bus stop turned into my grandma's house, where I used to catch the school bus. I apparently also had some craft supplies, set up outside, and was grabbing some to take home with me. I also needed a truck to pack up the majority of the supplies to take home. I had rainbow glitter, shoe slime (whatever that is), and other bottles of colorful stuff. I then woke up to get Kalen ready for school.