Today still feels weird.
Woke up, this morning, with my mind, stayed on Jesus and the fact, my house was still super quiet. No waking up to Brad hitting the walls, doors, and windows. The tv was not turned to Jerry Springer, Paternity Court, or Couples Court. I used to wake up to the news (miss you Eye Opener, Morning Dose, and Newsfix), but now couple drama.
I, first, woke up at 3 am, out of habit, and rolled back over and went to sleep, after putting my phone, on the charger. It was nice, getting up at 520 am, feeling semi-refreshed, without having to find ways to keep Brad calm for hours, after we both wake up.
Kalen was calmer too, even though he hit the walls, when he was stretching out. Kalen was also calmer walking to the bus stop, waiting, and while getting on the bus. It was nice not having to try to keep Brad stationed, in one section, away from the other little kids, while waiting for the bus. No trying to keep him from eloping and trying to walk off to the store. No getting hit, pushed, and kicked when I try to stop him. No getting spit on, this morning.
Yet, I need to know that he did good, last night. That he didn't hit the residential home's doors, windows, and walls. That he didn't wake the staff up between 2-4 am. That he didn't run off and try to elope to the park or some other place, near by. Will he be a fit for a group home, once he is eligible to attend, after the paperwork is done? Will his behavior change, for the better, once he gets back home or will he seriously need residential placement, a few months to a few years from now?
I don't have all the answers.