Sunday, January 20, 2013

1/20/13. Dr. Walter Larimore

Today at Fallbrook Church, the church invited Dr. Walter Larimore to speak today. He is an ADHD specialist. Some things I learned today include: (regular service and Sunday school notes combined)

  1. Some kids have been painted over with a mask. Keeps you from seeing who they really are. 
  2. ADHD kids have multi-track cognition
  3. ADHD kids have awareness of surroundings
  4. ADHD kids search for stimulation
  5. ADHD is not a learning disorder. It is not a myth. It is not caused by bad parenting. 
  6. ADHD kids are not retarded or lazy. 
  7. ADHD does not mean disaster.
  8. The true measure of success occurs when your kids find their passion. 

5 Tips for handling ADHD children:
  1. Put God First- People run to the internet, books, and other people first, but don't consider allowing God to tell you what tod do. Psalms 50:15 says to Call on God in times of trouble and God will deliver you. 
  2. Love your children unconditionally. Your child is a gift from God. Your kids are filled with energy, spontaneous, alert to changes, or even have a novel approach to problem solving. 
  3. Get right diagnosis and educate self. Get the right diagnosis. Some doctors are quick to diagnose children with ADHD and other behavioral issues. Then, educate self on your children's issues. 
  4. Seek wise counsel: Seek out other parents. Learn from each other. Share successes and mistakes. Pray for each other. Seek out counseling from psychologists, if needed. 
  5. Pick a coach to help you: Pick a coach for guidance and information. My first coaches were Saffiyah and Crystal (Rest in Peace). Saffy and Crystal were the first Autistic parents I met. I thought I was alone in this. Saffy and Crystal have been a tremendous help over the years. 
Balanced Parenting: In Sunday School, Larimore presented this model of parenting

ABC                                                                                                                           D


A-Affirmation: Be the best cheerleader for your kids. This requires both parents. If both parents are not available, find good people to influence your children

B-Blameless Love-Love your children unconditionally. They do not need to earn your love

C-Connection: Develop a connection with your kids. Spend quality time with them. Consider quantity of time as well. There is no quality without quantity. The children need a connection with three people: 
  1. Parents
  2. Friends
  3. Creator
D-Demandingness. Discipline. ADHD kids need discipline. structure. discipleship. Don't use the 1-2-3 method because Kids will learn they do not have to stop until you count to three. 

Parents, who are ABC parents, are golden retriever parents. They want to be the kids friends. They bribe the children. Parents, who are D parents can be too authoritarian, militaristic. Grizzly Bears. Parents need to strive to find balance. Find a support group. Get away from time to time to recharge, without the kids. Find a babysitter and take a night out. Develop a closer relationship with God. 

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Please leave a comment. Thank you. Stacie