Monday, December 2, 2019

Thankgiving Week in Review



Sunday:

My mother, who is my ride to church, spent Thanksgiving in Belize with my youngest sister, great-niece, and nephew. I knew about her trip, weeks in advance, but it did not prepare me for the drama, which ensued. 

I was undecided on whether or not to go to church. On one hand, I don't want to stay at home, the entire week. I also needed a break from my kids. My church has a great special needs program (kids and adults). My church is less than an hour away by bus. One bus takes me downtown and the other takes me to the transit center, across the street from the church. Normally,  we have to do is walk the sidewalk from the transit center to the bridge, then cross over to the church, except the transit center is undergoing reconstruction. 



The second bus let us off across the street from the transit center. We caught the traffic light and crossed over to the bridge. We had 2 more crosses left. Brad decided he wanted to walk off and started pointing at random objects. I don't know what he wanted. 

It is bad when your goal is in sight and you can't seem to reach it. I can see the church. People parking. He started kicking and screaming. He hit me in the front and back of my head. I got kicked in the knees and spit on.  He almost pushed me into the road. Where the red x is on the above map, is where he refused to cross over and started trying to walk off, 

I thought ok, the church has shuttle busses, which pass through here. Maybe I can wave one down. None of the shuttles would stop. I don't know if they can or not but I definitely could have used a lift. My next idea was to call the director of the special needs ministry to see if he can come outside and help. I got a disconnect notice. (I figured out later, I had his right number stored under another listing. I deleted the disconnected number). I also sent him a message on Facebook. 

I had to drag Brad into the grass to get him out of the sidewalk/road. If you are going to meltdown, let's go somewhere safe. A church member and his wife saw me struggling and offered help. Mr. C called the church directly (why didn't I think of this) and asked for the special needs department. He was able to bring Brad and Kalen to his car to drive,  2 seconds across the street, where the director met us and was able to help walk Brad in. 

I am very grateful for my church. Brad has had multiple incidents, where the special needs department stepped into help, versus putting all of us out of the church for his behavior. Houston's First Baptist is a loving environment. Thru the Roof is amazing. 

My mother allowed me to use her credit card to use a Lyft to head home versus trying to cross back over to the transit center. I didn't want another public meltdown. 

I don't think  I will be going to church, on days, when my mother is out of town or if I don't have Uber/Lyft money (It costs about $30 bucks to get from my house to church and vice versa). I am glad I went though. Life Bible Studies and Thru the Roof are closed on Dec 1. I would hate to show up on Sunday and no one was there. That would be another meltdown, waiting to happen. Another option is Metro Lift, which I will be calling, first thing Monday morning, provided my phone acts right and catches a charge. 



Monday:

Brad had a meeting with an insurance transition coordinator. Brad ages out of the pediatric insurance at 21 and the coordinator wanted to prepare me now. I am not ready to leave Texas Childrens Insurance. The doctors are consistent versus his former insurance company, who was losing psychiatrists to Texas Childrens and other hospitals/clinics. Some clinics also stopped taking Medicaid. Another doctor, I visited in Spring Branch (thought about embedding Google Maps but it showed the location of my house and other landmarks) told me he was not a psychiatrist. He didn't know why I was referred to him for psychiatry services, but he was able to write Brad's script for the month. I was going all over Houston and surrounding cities for his monthly appointments and prescriptions.

While she was talking to me about future insurance programs, Brad decided to start screaming. I followed him into my bedroom to calm him down. He started hitting and pushing again. This week is not going good so far. 


Tuesday:

Kalen went on the attack. I got hit in the head. He got mad at me for something and went semi postal.  Regular kiddie scream fests. Cooked. Attempted to clean. Went to bed too late. Kids had a lab work appointment on Wednesday. My phone also started having issues. Extra slow to charge. I think Kalen did something. Hopefully, it acts right. I can't afford another phone. 

Wednesday:

I had been dreading this day, for months. Brad needed lab work so his psych can better adjust his meds. She also wanted to test Brad for gynaecomastia. His chest looked weird when she examined him during his well check up/psych appointment. Kalen also needed lab work, so I decided to take them both, on the same day. Hospital appointments can be long and it's easier to schedule some of their hospital appointments together. 

The psych, the lab, and I tried to work together to make this appointment easier for the kids. Brad has a history of violence and aggression at the hospital. Kalen used take lab work and vaccinations like a pro, but over time, he cries and screams. Brad's biggest issue is the food court is next door to the lab. He wants food. We can get food after, but not before, provided, I have money. I did not have money on Wednesday. 

Preparation:


The psych told me to call the lab, 24 hours in advance, so they can prepare for the kids' arrival. I als was supposed to call the lab, 30 minutes before we arrived. Since the phone being stupid, I was not able to call 24 hours in advance. I was able to get enough charge to call 30 minutes in advance and left a voice mail. The clinic does not open up until 8. I wanted Brad to be sedated but his psych recommended his regular meds. I was also told that the food court CLOSED (gate down) between 9 and 9:30. I called medical transportation to schedule the appointment for 9. 

We arrived at the hospital around 9. We got to the 3rd floor.First thing, I noticed was the food court was still open. Brad also noticed. 

I filled out the forms for lab work. I asked for Child Life to come to the lab (they bring snacks, toys, electronics, colors to kids, who are struggling). Brad refused to walk into the clinic. He started screaming. He was hitting the windows at the gift shop. (Food court, gift shop, and lab are all right there together. The only thing, I ever bought was a $40 sweater because I was cold when Kalen had pace maker surgery). The director, who I called, also talked with me, in the lobby. 

The lab called Child Life. They also called security to assist. The Child Life person provided a good suggestion. She will go in with Kalen for his lab work, while I assisted security and lab personnel for Brad. Kalen will go first, followed by Brad. Brad started to calm down then boom, Kalen's turn. Brad did not like his brother, walking off without me or him. He started to scream again. 

Kalen went into the room with child life and the nurse to do his lab work. Brad walked into the room, next door, where the nurse was preparing the chair. Brad started kicking the walls and screaming. Nurse ran out. Security helped Brad into the chair and helped restrain him until the nurse was able to complete the tests. 

Security also escorted me down the garage elevators, versus the main elevators, back to the lobby, until medical transportation arrived to take us home. 

I did learn though, the hospital has a minor lab on the 11th floor. Next time, we are heading to the 11th floor, which will bypass the food court. 


Thursday:

Happy Thanksgiving. Today has not been a great day. Both kids woke up around 6. I am completely exhausted. It's been a long week and I need sleep. I gave the kids, their medications. Brad also picked up on a new behavior, which needs to stop ASAP. Brad already hits walls, doors, and ceilings, with his hands, feet, blankets, pillows, and clothes. He picked up my desk chair (which he has taken over) and hit the ceiling with it. I have small pieces of sheet rock on my living room floor. (I found a big rug near the dumpster, the other day. I cleaned it up, as much as I could, with bleach and laundry detergent, and placed it in Brad's area of the living room). My rug has visible chunks of sheetrock on it. The behavior has been constant, despite medications in his system. He took 2 naps. Woke up and was at it again. This is not the best day to be a special needs parent. I wish I was in Belize with my mother.

I did not cook. I was getting low on veggies and staples. I also don't want to spend a lot of money on one day, when my kids need to eat the whole month. I signed up for Operation Turkey to bring me 3 meals, weeks ago, before I started to run low. I am glad I did. My kids were able to eat a holiday meal, including mine. My sister and niece were supposed to cook but that meal has never arrived, as of today (Dec 2nd).



I am also thinking about a Thanksgiving cruise, next year. Let the cruise ship cook the food. I don't know which cruise line, I will be with, since Brad is too old for Camp Carnival.  Royal Caribbean is also an option because  of free priority boarding for past guests. I usually get Faster to the Fun , when the kids are with me, for Carnival Cruises, which comes with priority boarding and debarkation. Autism on the Seas costs too much, but they offer respite for staffed cruises. 

Friday, Saturday, Sunday: 

Church was not in session today, for us. Since it is a holiday weekend, the church doesn't have enough volunteers to staff departments. No life bible studies (Sunday school) and no special needs. I tried to watch online but kept having technical issues, such as delayed timing on my phone. When I logged in on the pc, it was minutes behind the phone. I figured, I watch later when kids went back to school and not too many devices are connected to the internet. 

Poop

Brad had an issue of poop. He went to the bathroom, after taking off his diaper. I figured, he wanted me to wipe him. Instead of waiting on me to wipe him, he plopped down on the toilet and finished handling his business in the toilet. I am still in shock. He went a few more times, throughout the day. I still had to rush in the bathroom to wipe him before he put on his diaper. Yay. 

The great kindle take over

He also tried to take over my kindle on Saturday. I have a kiddie playlist for Kalen, on there, for the rougher moments. When my phone started having issues, I thought I could placate Kalen by showing him Youtube on my kindle (big mistake). Here comes Saturday, Brad said a new word, "song". He wanted me to play him, the kiddie play list. No problem, but then, he wanted to watch youtube and find new music. Im like, uhhhhhhhhhhh, he has a weekend ipad from his teacher. He can play games on there. Only issue: no internet. 

Side note: Brad loves technology but he also likes to break technology. I am on my 4th kindle. 1st one, got stolen off my bed, while I was in the hospital with Kalen, for his pacemaker surgery. 2nd one and 3rd one, stopped charging. 4th one, I got on sale for half off. I had it a few months. The kids also have broken 4 of my phones in the past year or so. Brad also has broken multiple tablets and phones in the past (Samsung, RCA, Nabi 2, and Kalen's Nabi jr).  I can't afford a new phone. So my anxiety went high when Brad started wanting more than just the music. 

He sat and listened to the music for hours, versus the ipad. I thought of a good idea to try to put the internet on the ipad. The first ipad, he brought home, months ago, did not allow me to connect to anything. It had restrictions, placed by the school. The one, he has now, I never touched before, but I can try. I first tried to connect it to Xfinity wifi (my mama's account).  but it was denied due to an unsecure connection. Then, I connected it to my ATT and success, he was able to watch Youtube. I did not connect it to my Google though to be on the safe side, but he was able to watch his kiddie skits, while Kalen took back the Kindle and listened to the music and watched his skits. Both kids was out of my hair lol. (Of course, later on, Brad tried to come back to kindle land and Kalen went into the living room and brought back the ipad and started playing on it. No idea how he figured it out because I struggled just finding the settings). 

Connecting the internet reduced the chair throwing and chair hitting the ceiling, headache inducing behavior. I don't want to be put out because the upstairs neighbor, with a baby, complained about noise from the apartment below. That's another level of anxiety. Moving with two special needs kids within a few weeks, like I did last year. 

Have a blessed day. 

They went off to school great this morning. No issues. Glad to finally get a small break, until my 11 am appt. 

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Please leave a comment. Thank you. Stacie