I don't have that type of support

I don't have that type of support, physical support where I can talk to real people about real problems, especially with my oldest son. I have a great online presence of people, who I can talk to, but when I need out of the house, I don't have people I can call. Family out--because they do not understand or care to understand autism. Sometimes I feel like they feel Brad is a burden on them. I just want someone I can talk to, hang out with, minimize this loneliness I feel. Being an autistic parent is a lonely road.

Not everyone can deal with the meltdowns, temper tantrums, limited communication, lack of a fully potty-trained child. All I hear from relatives is how he screams and keeps them up at nite; how they can not wait until Brad sr. gets him back for the summer; how they only want to babysit the baby; that every problem Brad has is not mental and he needs a good butt whipping to get the bad out of him. When I hear those comments, I want to take my children far far away and never see these heathens but once or twice a year. Then they get upset because they won't see the baby. Sometimes I think these heathens forget I have two kids, instead of one. My kids and I are a package deal. You either take us all or none at all. I am not going to piece meal out my kids. I don't want someone taking the baby somewhere, leaving Brad behind, wondering why they did not take him. I may not always understand what is on this boy's mind, but I do understand exclusion.

Saturday Morning

Saturday Morning

I been up since 8 am, not because I want to, but because my 11 year old created a water park in the bathroom. There was water everywhere and he tried to use the baby's tub as a step stool. Then he got hungry for some chips and dip. I also made him clean up the mess he made on my bedroom floor. Mostly his books, flashcards, and my penny collection. I have to accept the fact that my room will never be perfectly clean again, especially not with two boys sharing the same space.  Later on, we went to the bank and family dollar for some diapers, wipes, and pull-ups. Boy 1 threw a few books around in the store. So happy to get out of there. Then he had a temper tantrum in the car because he saw something, but could not tell me what. So he tried to attack the baby by pinching Boy 2's cheeks and trying to bite his hand. Yay. The joys of an autistic mom. We back home now and he running around playing his "Bob Bob" game. The baby is finally asleep after dealing with his brother. He been cranky ever since the car ride.