Some of the highlights from the book:
- Many church leaders fall to temptation themselves, and the ones who do stay pure are often at a loss as to how to help those struggling (p. xvi). (note: I wish my church offered something on purity and celibacy to adults, instead of just to kids. I have asked, but no program exists yet. I am not even sure who to ask to get an accountability partner, without revealing too much of my past).
- Internal transformation requires work (p. xvi).
- Pages 6 to 9 discusses the prevalence of pornography using statistics. That section was mind-blowing. Porn is a billion dollar industry. Some internet porn is worth millions and billions. America is the top producer of DVD porn.
- Both men and women watch porn. Children, who watch porn, face detrimental effects, which include emotional trauma; reduced marriages; exposure to incorrect information about human sexuality, and increased risk of sexual compulsions.
- There is a direct connection between your sexual behavior and your destiny in Christ (p. 21). Our level of sexual purity will determine how useful and effective we are.
- Getting one taste of something can lead to wanting more (p.
32). If you think you can control lust, then you are deceived (p.
- When God has to discipline someone because of a hardened
heart, things can go wrong for them (p. 35). The book gave the story
of Terry, who printed off internet porn at work. The printer stopped
working temporarily. Once it started printing, IT was called. They
traced the problem to Terry. Terry got fired and his wife later
divorced him. (p. 36). Paul was making a phone call to set up some
sex, but did not realize his wife was on the other line. Stan was
blackmailed by his mistress, while Marc was sued for sexual
- God provides you weapons to deal with the enemy (p. 47). Some
weapons include the fear of God, wisdom, and the word of God. The
limitation of the weapons is that they can only go in one direction
at a time (either facing the enemy or facing those you love. )
- Lust is wrong. Lust can produce fruit and it can lead to
death. The first stage of sin is lust. (p. 49). Sin is the evidence
the seed has grown (p. 49). Sin also can be fertilized with repeat
behavior (p. 50).
- You have to be willing to become clean. You need the right
protection, armor, and a plan to become clean (p. 58 to 59). You
also need to be honest and accountable (p. 61). You also need a
consequence set-up, if you do fall prey to sexual sin (p. 62).
Sexual immorality does not just affect you, but everyone else around you. Job, family, kids, social life, etc. I did not realize this until years and years later. If I stayed out late, someone would have to wake up to let me in (since I never had my own place). I had to work hard to hide toys and my porn addiction. Hiding the laptop under covers and plugging the ear phones in, for example. I sought out pleasure before relationships. Pleasure also caused me to think lust was love. I been addicted a few times. I wanted to date some of these men, not for their brains and long-term potential, but for their body parts (and what the body parts could do). Sexual immorality definitely distorted relationships. I heard rumors of people not liking me because I was too sexual, but at the same time, the person, who told me about the rumor, wanted to have sex with me. Sex defined how I treated people of the opposite sex. If you wanted to date me, then I would not have sex with you. If you wanted sex, then it was mostly a one-night stand. Had no interest in repeat sex partners, unless they met a few standards.
I loved this book and definitely recommend it to men and women.